The Shallow End

Argh! The Chores!

One of the side effects of being abandoned by one's family (okay, really, enough with the self-pity already!) is having to take on their daily chores. So today was my first day home alone and let me tell you, there's work to be done around here! Like this morning, I had to take out the trash all by myself. I KNOW! Cry, cry, sniff, sniff. Not only did I have to haul the kitchen trash outside but then I had to haul the two large outside cans down the long driveway to the street, one at a time, in the freezing cold (through 3 feet of snow and freezing rain...maybe...okay, probably not).

And then, I had to feed the horse. Having no idea just how to feed the horse, I started out by giving him the wrong hay, the hay that was rotten because it had been sitting out in the rain. So I called my husband and asked if the hay was supposed to smell like mold. No! Not that hay, don't feed the horse that hay, give him the other hay, the hay under the tarp, the dry hay (you idiot)! He didn't say "you idiot," but I could hear these words nonetheless. So I carted the moldy hay out of the horse's reach and gave him fresh hay.

And then I had to check the horse's water. Frozen! Chip, chip, curse, curse. Why is the bloody heater sitting over there in the grass instead of in the tank where it's supposed to be? Probably for the same reason that the hose is lying in the grass, also frozen and attached to the frozen faucet back at the house, because when my husband left home, it was 65 degrees outside. I should have gone outside last night and taken care of these things before I went to bed. Buckets of warm water to the rescue and the horse is finally watered. Stupid horse.

But that's not everything. No. Next up, the goldfish. A simple pinch of food is all they take. Ahem. Except when you open the tank to find that the filter is completely clogged and the little paddle wheel is not atwirling. So a bit of a cleaning was in order, lest the goldfish not live to see another day. Which would be sad really, because, gee, they're getting so big that we might actually have to name them (naming the fish has typically been the beginning of the end for the fish).

Next? The dogs. They have not let me out of their sight since I rolled out of bed, worried I might forget to feed and medicate them. Smokey loves his medicine. Thank goodness for that. I'd hate to be force feeding him pills. So food, medicine and fresh water for the boys.

And lastly? The birds. There are 5 caged birds living in our house. They sing a beautiful song. They also make a hideous mess. Yesterday, I vacuumed up their mess. Today, I checked their food and water supplies and noticed that they need their toenails trimmed. I'm afraid to try this on my own, so instead I worry about their long nails and how they can't get a grip on their perch. Because I need something else to worry about.

So then, when I came home? All of the above, in reverse order.

At least we no longer own snakes, rabbits, rats, hamsters, chameleons, shrews or tarantulas. Things could be worse. But I'll sure be glad when my peoples come back home. 8-}

posted by Gwynne @ 8:54 PM