I'm All Out of Blogfodder
I rely heavily on divine inspiration for whatever spews forth on these pages. You could no doubt see that in my work. ;-) And lately, all of God's work has apparently been spent sustaining me through seemingly endless hours of teaching, hacking and spewing, well, things not worth detailing on the world wide web.
But my sense of duty calls. That, and a certain blogger friend (who has weaseled her way into Eric's esteemed neighborhood...anyone else notice that? Way to go, Beth! Our property values are going up as I speak!) has called me on the table for not fulfilling my blogging duties. So here I am. Blogging.
Um.
Speechless.
I'm all talked out. My throat hurts. Anyone care to learn about Basic Trust Taxation? Or some Estate Planning Basics? I'm all over that. Over and over and over. But it's finally over! I could never be a full-time teacher. I'd wear myself out, working up the adrenaline needed to "entertain" those who insist on sitting there looking at you, eyes half closed, arms crossed, leaning back in their chair, legs crossed too, caring not one bit about what I am saying. I would love to shoot spit wads at those people! On the other hand, I love the ones who sit in the front, asking questions, nodding like they understand, showing enthusiasm for what I, just minutes before walking in the room, might have been less than enthusiastic about myself. I want to take these people under my wing and mentor them. I want them to work in my office.
My favorite part of teaching was the part where I got to wear a microphone. With my voice already altered by my cold, the amplification really accentuated it. I sounded like Darth Vader. That part was cool. But then about midway through this morning's session (before I was fully awake and caffeinated), I was droning away and reminded myself of Ben Stein in Ferris Beuller's Day Off...you know the part where he's going "Beuller? Beuller?" I cracked myself up. But nobody else "got it." Then, as I was warming up, I became less of a drone and more like the "know-it-all teacher" that I pretended to be when I was about 7 and teaching my 5 year old brother how to read in my make-believe school. For crying outloud, I was very stuffy this morning, literally and figuratively. Not at all in the mood for joking around. Yesterday was better. I hadn't worn myself out yet. I was still running on adrenaline yesterday. Today was just exhausting.
My cold is on the way out but I violated rule #1 when fighting a cold and took more antihistamine than I should have. I had to in order to teach. The downside is that in about a week or two, I'm probably going to suffer a sinus infection. Happens every time. But I'll keep popping sudafed and drinking lots of water to keep the sinuses draining and maybe I'll escape the infection.
And in other "news," we have...let's see. We have a big Fur Ball to attend this Saturday! I'm on the board of a local humane society and our big fundraiser is the Fur Ball. It's a lot of fun and well-attended which means mucho mula for the dogs and cats that are unfortunate enough to require their services. So there's that.
And...
I'm also on the board of a local art gallery for which I have financial statements to prepare before tonight's meeting at 7:00 and so, I must get going...
Thanks to all who have stopped by faithfully in my absence!
But my sense of duty calls. That, and a certain blogger friend (who has weaseled her way into Eric's esteemed neighborhood...anyone else notice that? Way to go, Beth! Our property values are going up as I speak!) has called me on the table for not fulfilling my blogging duties. So here I am. Blogging.
Um.
Speechless.
I'm all talked out. My throat hurts. Anyone care to learn about Basic Trust Taxation? Or some Estate Planning Basics? I'm all over that. Over and over and over. But it's finally over! I could never be a full-time teacher. I'd wear myself out, working up the adrenaline needed to "entertain" those who insist on sitting there looking at you, eyes half closed, arms crossed, leaning back in their chair, legs crossed too, caring not one bit about what I am saying. I would love to shoot spit wads at those people! On the other hand, I love the ones who sit in the front, asking questions, nodding like they understand, showing enthusiasm for what I, just minutes before walking in the room, might have been less than enthusiastic about myself. I want to take these people under my wing and mentor them. I want them to work in my office.
My favorite part of teaching was the part where I got to wear a microphone. With my voice already altered by my cold, the amplification really accentuated it. I sounded like Darth Vader. That part was cool. But then about midway through this morning's session (before I was fully awake and caffeinated), I was droning away and reminded myself of Ben Stein in Ferris Beuller's Day Off...you know the part where he's going "Beuller? Beuller?" I cracked myself up. But nobody else "got it." Then, as I was warming up, I became less of a drone and more like the "know-it-all teacher" that I pretended to be when I was about 7 and teaching my 5 year old brother how to read in my make-believe school. For crying outloud, I was very stuffy this morning, literally and figuratively. Not at all in the mood for joking around. Yesterday was better. I hadn't worn myself out yet. I was still running on adrenaline yesterday. Today was just exhausting.
My cold is on the way out but I violated rule #1 when fighting a cold and took more antihistamine than I should have. I had to in order to teach. The downside is that in about a week or two, I'm probably going to suffer a sinus infection. Happens every time. But I'll keep popping sudafed and drinking lots of water to keep the sinuses draining and maybe I'll escape the infection.
And in other "news," we have...let's see. We have a big Fur Ball to attend this Saturday! I'm on the board of a local humane society and our big fundraiser is the Fur Ball. It's a lot of fun and well-attended which means mucho mula for the dogs and cats that are unfortunate enough to require their services. So there's that.
And...
I'm also on the board of a local art gallery for which I have financial statements to prepare before tonight's meeting at 7:00 and so, I must get going...
Thanks to all who have stopped by faithfully in my absence!
posted by Gwynne @ 4:29 PM
4 Comments:
Yay! Now I have a reason to procrastinate on my paper writing! :)
I used to make Ferris Bueller references when I was teaching - none of my students ever got them either. But I thought I was funny and, hey, I was in charge. Sometimes I would tell really long, drawn out, pun jokes (you know like the one about Sam and Bill - the clams) and then wait for them to laugh. The good students, the ones who wanted As, always laughed.
I also used to make those who came in late sing for entry. Really cut down on tardiness.
I hope you escape the evil sinus infection! They're no fun. And they're contagious - don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Tim tried that on me, but I'll just point out that until we were dating, I'd never had one. He's always got one. 'Nough said.
I think Eric was just hoping to influence me into more of a social life. But I will point out that there's a reason my blog name starts with an A (that reason is that the word "and" starts with an A). ;)
Ok. Back to work for me.
One last thought - if you replace "Spam" with "grout" the song is just as entertaining.
Sorry you are not feeling much better! Welcome to the club Beth hehe.
But I thought I was funny and, hey, I was in charge.
Heh. Yeah. That's all that counts. ;-) I like that you waited for them to laugh. It's all about timing. Looonnnggg silent pauses between jokes is good. And making them sing to enter is what I always wished teachers would do when I made an effort to get to my morning classes but others would straggle in late, recovering from hangovers. Make 'em sing! Sadistic perhaps, but where's the justice otherwise?
Grout-a-lot! It's my new theme song!
Rachel, I am feeling better now. Just anticipating some backlash from all the cold meds. Thanks! :-)
Re: the "Fur Ball," I credit the bravery and creativity of the folks who reignited the fire of this organization. It's over 60 years old, but in the last few years has really turned into one of the best humane societies, with the greatest facilities, that I've ever seen. There will be over 1,000 people at the Fur Ball, including many of the social elite (some even sporting togas ;-). I'll be sure to post all about it (and will try and remember my camera).
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